My fiancee, Nicole, hired a male stripper for her boss' birthday last Friday.
The very best part of the event was when the “entertainer” texted Nicole to tell her he had a hard deadline to meet and that he had to be finished dancing by no later than 4:45PM because he had to make his graduation from Arizona State.
To be honest, I wish I would have thought of this during college, then I wouldn’t be sitting on about 10k worth of student loan debt.
Why do people still have car alarms? It’s the only thing I hate about living on 4th ave. IBTs dance music thumps thru my windows every night of the week and it’s a god damn lullaby compared to car alarms.
No one responds to your fucking car alarm. I hear one every night and my initial and only reaction is that I want to bash in your skull for thinking anyone gives a shit about your shitty car and its shittier alarm. The only thing more archaic than a car alarm is the printing press. Or a fucking CD player. Which you probably have since you drive a 2002 Dodge Stratus. No one is interested in stealing that thing.
FUCK! I just want to watch SVU and chill with my puppy without having to hear your fucking car alarm!